The 10 Biggest, Most Loser-ish Moments of the Year So Far

It’s time to reclaim The Biggest Loser.

During the aughts and beyond, this phrase became a recognizable nickname for the person who unnaturally dropped the highest number of pounds during an inhumane weight-loss competition. Thank God that’s over — it’s cancelled.

Now, it’s up to us to take over this concept and make it meaningful, practical, and applicable. Let’s start this mission off right by offering to you the 10 biggest, most loser-ish moments of the year so far. These incidents have made us cringe, scream, and/or shut our laptops in disbelief. Celebrities, film studios, average Joes, and government entities alike have been showing their entire asses the first half of 2025, and it’s imperative that they be called out for it. Ain’t that the American way?

As the legend goes, comedian Katt Williams opened a portal in January 2024 during his conversation with former athlete-turned-aspiring “journalist” Shannon Sharpe. While talking to Sharpe about his Hollywood friendships, Williams made a hilarious, but salient point: “You having an unnatural allegiance to losers is not like you.” This is how we should be moving. If you see ‘em, point ‘em out.

Most of the moronic offenses listed below were self-inflicted instances of stupidity. Other moments were just mishandled, and mishandled, and mishandled, until the point of no return. Regardless of the specific brand of brainlessness, the following losers are the biggest of 2025 so far. If you happen to make an appearance on this list: Consider this an invitation to get your shit together.

The (Ex)-Husband of That Lady Who Really Preferred Romeo Santos

Do you remember that episode of The Boondocks when neighborhood cornball Tom Dubois damn near lost his wife to Usher? Not only was it based on a true story, but it also became an eerily comic harbinger of how marriages can be tested in the presence of celebrities.

One of the wildest examples of a fame-unraveled relationship came in January, at the hands (and lips) of Romeo Santos of popular bachata group Aventura. While performing in the Dominican Republic, the band brought a fan onstage, and my God, did she have a mission. The stan, named Miriam Cruz, planted multiple big ones on Santos, who, despite his inclination to spread kisses everywhere he goes, didn’t appear to be the most receptive to tonguing her down.

“I have to acknowledge that this achievement came at a very high cost: the breakup of my 10-year marriage,” Cruz wrote in a now-deleted social media statement. No shit? Chatter online suggests the relationship was already on the rocks, and it seems Cruz’s husband had officially had enough. In the words of the Boondocks waiter who witnessed Tom’s marriage slip through his fingers in real time: “Sorry, man. Wouldn’t let that shit happen to me, thouuugh.”

Drake and the Never-Ending L

Drake already took the heftiest L possible all throughout last year. To make it even worse, since November, he has been showcasing his proclivity for litigiousness, and each update only sounds more pathetic: “Kendrick is calling me names again, put him in time out!”

Drake carried that big loser energy directly into 2025. First, he announced that his Anita Max Win tour in Australia would kick off the same night as Super Bowl LIX — you know, the one where Kendrick Lamar lyrically beat his ass so bad in front of 133.5 million people that the tattle-telling twerp whined to his lawyers? Again?? All we need now is for Drake to sue the NBA for playing Kendrick while cutting to commercial, and Conan O’Brien for his “Not Like Us” joke at this year’s Oscars.

As if that weren’t enough, Drake has continually supported morally questionable streamers like Adin Ross, DJ Akademiks, and xQc, furthering his trajectory toward the incel manosphere. In that vein, Kai Cenat, the leader of Gen-Z influencers, ​revealed that Drake would be selflessly (derogatory) giving away hundreds of thousands of dollars during a livestream scheduled for June 12 — the same night as Kendrick Lamar and SZA’s first Toronto stop on their Grand National tour. The stream was postponed, but clearly, Drake had every right to be pressed: Fans from his hometown gave K-Dot a two-minute standing ovation after he performed his monster diss track, and even requested an encore (which was not obliged). With every development, he proves again that Kendrick was right: He really is not like us.

Now You See a Nazi, Now You Don’t

Despite punk rock classics like the Dead Kennedys’ “Nazi Punks Fuck Off,” a few losers in the scene haven’t gotten the memo. That includes a certified weirdo who attended the Punk Rock Bowling & Music Festival in Las Vegas in May. Instead of inconspicuously blending in and enjoying the soothing sounds of bands like FLAG and The Damned, this witless wonder boldly walked around the festival wearing a T-shirt displaying the SS logo adopted by Nazi Germany in the 1930s. His parade didn’t last long, as a widely circulated video showed other attendees responding to the man’s unabashed fascism with forceful shoves and a flurry of blows. As security escorted Sir Lose-A-Lot off the premises, people could be heard shouting, “No fucking Nazis!” and “Get out of our scene!” There’s an important lesson here: If the Nazi punks won’t fuck off by themselves, then other punks will help them to get the job done.